Spring Cranberry Salad

Want to impress your friends?  Want to say, "Yo, check out this complicated and fancy lookin' salad?"  I mean, who doesn't want to say that, really.  This is your salad.  It's deceivingly simple, but your friends will think you're a bona fide Martha Stewart.

You'll need:

- 1 head of romaine, or a spring greens mix
- a handful of dried cranberries
- some chopped up celery, about 1 or 2 stalks
- 2 shallots
- some crumbled goat cheese
- poppy seed dressing, the creamier, the better

First, wash and tear up your romaine into bite sized pieces.  Or dump a bag of spring mix in a bowl.  Do you enjoy how I give you options?

Now we want to caramelize the shallots to make them really sweet.  Saute them up into smallish pieces, and put them in a saute pan over medium heat.  They don't need any oil or anything, their natural sugars will start to sweat out and make everything realll tasty like.

While those are browning up nicely, we can start assembling the salad.  You'll want to add the celery, and the goat cheese for some tang.

Couple of handfuls of cranberries right on top...

And now add the caramelized shallots...

If you want at this point you can add some DELICIOUS candied walnuts or pecans, but who has time to candy their own pecans?  Plus, those suckers are EXPENSIVE.

Pour on some scrumptious poppy seed dressing...

And bada boom bada bing you're in business.  Not too shabby for about 10 minutes work, eh?

Enjoy!

<3 Courtzilla

Texas Chocolate Sheet Cake

 Texas sheet cake.  Why do they call it "Texas" sheet cake?  I have no idea.  One thought is that it may be called that because it makes enough cake to feed the entire state of Texas.  I wish I was kidding.  Might want to halve this recipe unless you're planning on going up a pant size.

What you'll need:
- 2 cups of flour
- 2 cups of sugar
-1/4 tsp salt
- 4 heaping tablespoons of cocoa.  If you're feeling fancy use the dutch process fancy pants kind.  If you're me use Hershey's.
- 1/2 tablespoon instant coffee grounds
- 1/2 cup buttermilk
- 1 cup boiling water
- 2 beaten eggs
- 1 teaspoon baking soda
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1 sweet dinosaur cupcake pan (optional)

Let's get crackin.

First things first, boil your water so it's ready to go.  Simple enough.

Ballin'.  Alrighty, now in a mixing bowl stir together your flour, sugar and salt.

Here's where things get serious.  Melt TWO sticks of butter in a medium sized pot.  Oh, be still my heart.

 

To the melted butter, add your cocoa and coffee.  Quirky fact: adding instant coffee to your chocolate cake/chocolate chip cookies will make Hershey's cocoa taste more rich.  See?  Learning all kinds of things today aren't we.

 

Now, add the boiling water to the chocolate/butter mixture.

Take a sniff.  Die a little.

Let this boil for about 30 seconds, then turn off the heat.  Pour the chocolate on top of your flour, and stir to combine.  You'll want to hang out a bit and let that cool down.

Forgive my yellow bowl, it does not realize what it does to pictures.

While that's cooling off, measure out your buttermilk in a measuring cup.  Add the baking soda, vanilla and eggs and whisk it around to combine.

If your flour/chocolate has cooled down enough, mix it together with the buttermilk mixture.  Make sure it's cool though, or else you'll wind up with scrambled eggs, and I'm sorry, but scrambled egg chocolate sheet cake just doesn't have the same ring to it.

Pour this onto a sheet pan and bake at 350 degrees for about 20 minutes.  I don't have a sheet pan with rims that high, so I used my trusty 9 x 13" pan.  NBD.

After I got the batter into that pan, I realized... I still have a ton of batter left.  There's only one reasonable solution to such a problem.

DINOSAUR CUPCAKES.  I'm sorry, but just bask in the glory of this awesome pan.  Are you jealous you don't have one??!??!

You could make a frosting for this cake, but why?  It's honestly so moist and so rich, just a dusting of powdered sugar will do.  Make sure the cake is completely cool though, or else the powdered sugar will just melt into the cake.

Delicious.  As for the dino cupcakes?

I had no problem getting rid of those.

Ahahahhaa.  I love that pan.

Enjoy!

<3 Courtzilla

Slow Cooked BBQ Pulled Pork

Don't you love a recipe that takes like 15 minutes of actual cooking? Say hello to pulled pork. Throw it in the crock pot with minimal seasoning, and watch 2 movies on a hungover Saturday while it fills your house with a crazy delicious (Dr. Pibb + Redvines?) scent. Don't believe me? Give this a try.

What you'll need...
-A cut of pork. Either pork butt, or pork shoulder. The idea is lowww and sloowwww so the tougher, cheaper meats will break down and get realll tender. You'll need about 2-3 ish pounds.
-1 small yellow onion
-3 tablespoons worcestershire sauce. I hate both spelling, and saying that word for the record.
-water
-About 4-6 buns
-1/2 a bottle of your favorite bbq sauce - I used Sweet Baby Ray's... it's necessary.

Alrighty! Roughly chop up your onion and lay it on the bottom of the crock pot.


Place the pork on top of the onions. I got some sort of weird cut that was on sale, but it turned out delicious. Go ahead and add the worcestershire sauce.


Fill the crock pot full of water so it's fully covering the pork. Our crock pot is kind of small... so stop making fun of the dry pork. I'm not as perfect as I may come across on paper.


I added some paprika and cumin, because I can't leave things alone. It's not necessary though.


OK! You're ready to go. Put the setting on low, and leave it alone. For .... six hours. SIX HOURS. You could go to work and just let this bubble away, then come home to tender, delicious pulled pork. Here's what it looks like when it's done....


I pick out the pork and shred it, discarding the onions.



I find it easiest to use two forks. It's so easy since it's falling apart on it's own anyway. Mix the shredded pork with the BBQ sauce. I only use about 1/2 the bottle, or else I think it gets too soupy and over powers the pork.


COME GETCHA SOME. Let it cook away on low for about another hour, stirring occasionally so the pork doesn't stick to the sides.


Who loves me? My roommates, that's who.

Throw it on a bun, maybe top it with some coleslaw or just leave it plain.


Either way, it's scrumptious!!


Jealous much?

Enjoy!

<3 Courtzilla